The Goodwins

We were recently on vacation in Florida and my mom commented on how cute the girl in the pink hat was… that girl is our daughter Ella. And she is very cute, even without her pink hat.

Ella is in hats a lot to protect her many scars from the sun, and she shines underneath them all. She is a beautiful little girl and even in her “I’m almost 4 and I can do it myself attitude” we find so much to love. She is the light of our life (along with little brother Justice) and we have learned so much from her.  But it isn’t her Down syndrome that is teaching us, it is Ella herself and her personality. I don’t know if taking away her Down Syndrome would change who she is or not, but as her mom I would never be willing to find out even if I could. I love her everyday just as she is.

Before Ella I loved. I loved her dad, I loved my family, I loved living a life full of travel and adventure, I loved chocolate, I loved my life… but I didn’t know how deep the love of a child would be. And I never thought about if I could ever love someone with Down syndrome – it simply never crossed my mind.  And then Ella was born and my heart was hers in an instant. The first year was a struggle of emotions and grief over the loss of what we thought our plans for her future would be, but we prevailed in love. The next several years were filled with struggles from surgeries and medical procedures but we prevailed in love. And now as all our known struggles are behind us and we watch in awe as Ella discovers a whole new world in school, we continue to prevail in love. Our hearts are overflowing!

But what I know, and what I want everyone to learn is that Ella is Ella. She is not a girl with Down syndrome who happens to be our daughter, or a teacher’s student, or a child’s friend.  I pray that Ella will be accepted into our world for just the person God has made her to be; that she will find her place in life and be happy and fulfilled. It’s the same prayer I imagine all parents have for all children. When I look into her future I am afraid for all of the unknowns that lay ahead but in truth, most days I forget that she has Down syndrome as it is so easy just to enjoy who she is.  She laughs and giggles and cries. She dances and runs and walks. She smiles and pouts and cheers. She is simply Ella, our amazing little girl.

Ahead I know there are more struggles waiting to find us and her, but today everything is perfect and just as it should be.  God has given us the gift of love in both our children and that will always be more than enough for us.

Last weekend our little family spent a wonderful Sunday afternoon playing in the beautiful fall weather. (ie yard work for dad)

We enjoyed the warm sunshine and the rustling of leaves for hours on end. Maybe dad could have worked faster if the kids and I hadn’t offered to help so much, but who could resist that sweet little girl dragging a full size rake around the yard. You just have to hug a girl like that!

It’s amazing how a simple day can bring the best pleasures. A joyful smile on a bright eyed boy who is experiencing his first fall fills your heart faster than you could imagine it might. It’s a wonderful world in which we live.

And can anyone find a better way to make a kid smile than with a giant pile of leaves? I mean really who else but a child would dive head first into a bunch of dead leaves, sticks, bugs, etc without even a second thought for anything but fun!

So, here’s hoping for a lot more beautiful days to frolic this fall.

I took this short video on my blackberry yesterday. Please pardon the shakiness of the camera as it was harder than I thought to hold the blackberry steady as Ella moved around on my lap.  If you look closely you can see Justice in the background happily swinging!

If you’re not seeing anything, try clicking here for the smaller version

or clicking here for the larger version.

Ella is doing a bit better.  After several crying spells last night she’s doing better.  Her right eye is still swollen  shut but she’s starting to be able to see out of her left eye.

I left her, after several goodbye kisses and hugs, as seen in the picture to the right, watching Veggietales, eating bananas and juice.

Bonnie tells me she’s still in good spirits and has been playing like her normal self.

I’m back in the office dealing with crises, crisii?, multiple crisis-es?, well lets say multiple issues, but they seem a bit less dire for some reason.

Ah, life goes on….

Just waiting for Kirk to bring the car around and then we’re gone!